SORRY, I'M NOT BUYIN'

SORRY, BUT I'M NOT BUYIN'

Let's get this story straight --

Michael Irvin was arrested, because the cops found a crack pipe in his car. The explanation Irvin wants you to believe is that the pipe belonged to an old friend who took a break from his rehab house to visit the Irvin house for some turkey, giblets and festivities.

For starters, I think it is safe to assume that if that story is legit the rehab house is failing the friend miserably.

Michael goes on to treat us to more fiction, by telling us that he took the pipe with him to get it out of his house, away from his children, and into the local supermarket dumpster. Poor Michael --- He was so busy with so many more important issues that he forgot the toy of the devil was stashed in his glove box.

Now, this is where the story takes a turn for the worse, for those people that think poor Mr. Irvin actually has a clue.

Irvin said, and I quote, ``I know the type of demons they have to fight and I am going to help them, because it's the only way I can keep them from getting to my family. I have to clean up my friends because they are around my boys. It's upsetting.''

Yo Mike!! Helping them is NOT the only way you can keep them from getting to your family. Poor Mike is upset that he has to clean up his friends, because they will contaminate his boys.

How about this Mike --- If they exist, try keeping your crack head friends away from your family and especially your boys. That's what normal parents do. They keep their children away from the trash. They don't bring the trash home for the boys to have some new playmates and then lament their misfortune for having to deal with such upsetting circumstances.

Judge Judy would call Irvin a dope and a liar and she would be 100% correct.